Last week came and went by swiftly, yet in retrospect I really did not achieve much except for maybe the letter of complaint I managed to write to my bank for terminating my credit card. It was one of those weeks where I did not feel like doing any work. Basically I just faffed around- played online games , chatted and watched online videos despite the fact that I had so much to do. Am so lagging behind in my project, but I just could not be bothered! I tried to do some research but boy I couldn't get into the flow at all. It was a really bad week.
It might not be the best method but I have noticed that I sometimes deal with disappointments by getting into a "lazy" mood. Am like what's the point anyway? Why am I stressing myself?? Really what happened was that I got rejected by two companies I applied to and I didn't realise it hit me so hard till I saw the week go by just like that. In my head I knew that God was working everything out for my good but in my heart I just couldn't "move on" to do other things. It was like a pity party only I wasn't wailing but I practically wasted a whole week loafing!
During the week, I woke up one morning panicking and asked God "Ok what next?!, Lord you know I need a job before I finish school, I need to be sure of what the plan is, don't keep me in the dark here!!!" After about an hour of having dreadful thoughts I decided to have my quiet time and the scripture for that day (I use "Our Daily Bread" for my daily devotion) was from Matthew 6:25-34. The first verse (vs 25) actually hit the nail on the head - "So I tell you, don't worry about everyday life whether you have enough food, drink, clothes. Doesn't life consist of more than food and clothing?". At that moment, it was like I could hear God telling me "You worry too much, my child". In the same scripture, Jesus was also talking about the birds that do not need to plant or harvest but they always have food to eat. Yet, I am more valuable to Him than the birds!
Reading on, I realised I needed to seek God's face and make His work my primary concern instead of worrying. He said in His word that if I seek first His Kingdom He will add every other blessing to me. I still don't have a job , neither do I know what the plan is but I do know that the plan is GOOD and all I have to do is trust and seek HIM.
By the way I feel much better now and I intend to get back to work but then again I know I have to take some practical steps on my "lazy" mood swings. I can't afford to be wasting days and weeks any time I get disappointed! First step is to admit that I have an issue- done! Second step is to get suggestions, comments or advice from y'all on how to effectively deal with disappointments. I look forward to hearing from you :)