Ten things Tuesday (04) + Question

Hi my peeps…how you all doing?

Another Ten Things Tuesday is here. Here is a link to my last list.

I am thankful for:

my salvation through Christ Jesus,
my hubby,
my marriage,
my family,
my friends,
my job,
my business,
my health,
my finances and
the things I am believing God for that I have not seen in the physical.

So what are you thankful for?

I have a question for you guys. What do you do when you think/feel/can prove u are the one always making the first move to initiate contact with some friends. Do u:

a) Cut them some slack and keep on making the first move.
b) Stop making contact and see if your friends will remember you exist one day
c) Tell them how you feel and live happily ever after (hopefully)
d) Move them to your acquaintance category, life is too short to be bothered with such friends
e) None of the above (Any other suggestions??)

“Make Time” Woman

Looks like so many bloggers are either getting engaged or married…Am so excited! Anyway a friend send this to me and I though to send to all my fellow “woman” bloggers; single & married likewise. Let me know what you think! Oh male bloggers u are also welcome to comment as well o. Do you agree or disagree? LOL.

"Be the change you want to see": A story from a woman to all women!

When I was preparing to get married, I started getting all sorts of advice especially at bridal showers and things like that from family and friends. But one of the most interesting "lessons" came from a woman I met for the first time, just a few weeks before the big day. She said, "Honey, whatever you do, don't ever let yourself become a "make-do" woman. I had no idea what she meant, but, of course, she was about to explain. She continued, "Men" don't deny themselves anything. Whatever they want to buy, they buy.
Whatever they want to do, they do. Meanwhile, there is the wife, making do with her hair not being done, her clothes from yesteryear, her nails in need, never had a pedicure, scraping the bottom of her tube of lipstick! Oh, I could go on and on with how "we" make do. And why? Because the car needs fixing, this bill is behind, we have to use our time to take care of this, or take care of that; we're saving for this, working, cooking, cleaning, raising, etc." She warned me to never become a make-do woman, because she says if you start, it is hard to stop and one could easily find themselves making-do for the rest of their lives. I vowed it would never happen to me. I didn't think much more of the conversation until one day, I began to take notice, she was right.
Men are a lot better at being good to themselves. Some call it being selfish, there has to be another word for it. Tell me if you know. Whatever you call it. It does have its place. When they want to play ball, or golf, or fish, they go! When they want to buy clothes, or equipment, or video games, or whatever their "thing" is, they buy! Have you ever tried to stop one? Has anyone ever been able to stop one? Let me know! When I look around, I see a whole heap of Make-do women, married or not, with or without children, they
are all over the place! I have decided that I am going to make my best effort to become a "MAKE-TIME" woman! I will make the time to do what I need to do to be good to myself, whether that's a trip to the salon, or the gym or the mall. This time I'm going to take a lesson from the guys! All right ladies, single and married... Let's NOT be "MAKE-DO" Women! Let's LOVE OURSELVES and ENCOURAGE each other!

Have a nice weekend!!!

Assertiveness Tips

Finally in today’s post I am going to share some everyday assertiveness tips that you might find useful. You might want to read up the introductory post here before continuing.


By the way, someone asked me after my introductory post what the difference is between being aggressive and being assertive. I must acknowledge that there is a thin line between aggressiveness and assertiveness. However two key differences when communicating or pushing back is in your tone of voice and body language. Assertive speaking often involves the use of "I" statements. For example "I feel upset when you take my book and don’t put it back where you found it," rather than, "You make me feel upset when you take my book and don’t put it back where you found it". When being assertive, there is no room for sarcasm or attack.



There are so many assertiveness tips out there but I have selected a few. All, some or none might be applicable to you.


Recognise that people are responsible for their own behaviour: have u ever been upset when a friend or loved one comes to you for advice and they go right ahead to do the exact opposite of what you advised them to do?! It can be very frustrating right? We can’t force our loved ones to do what we tell them and the earlier we realise this, the better for us. Sometimes we take the blame when people take the wrong step after we’ve warned/cajoled/begged them not too and the consequence is very grave. As much as we empathise with them, which is the best we can do, every man is responsible for his own behaviour.

Also speaking about behaviour, a common example that comes to mind is when people break up. The person who initiates the break up feels guilty and wants to rescue their ex from their pain. Unfortunately breaking up comes with pain and in as much as you were the one that initiative the break up, the way the ex deals with the pain is their responsibility and not yours. I know this sounds harsh but it is the truth. If we take it upon ourselves to be responsible for how they deal with their pain we would feel obliged to do anything for them even at the expense of our happiness and maybe another relationship. You keep wondering what the ex is thinking, u feel bad when you hear what they have said about you somewhere…and you can’t move on. That is definitely not a place where you want to be. The best you can do is pray that God will help them deal with their pain and move on with your life. We can’t play God.

Recognise that people are different and are entitled to their own point of view: We’ve just had a recent example of this on some blogs where people have had different opinions about an issue. This is bound to happen as people form opinions based on their background, religion, experiences, values etc. We should learn to listen to other people’s POV even if we do not agree as more often than not there is more than one different position for any given situation. By listening to what others have to say we might just learn something new and add to our knowledge base. Also we should be respectful when expressing our point of view.

Let other people know exactly what you want without making unclear requests: wouldn’t life be easier if people could know what we are thinking and we didn’t have to tell them. I for one will find it a relief. Sometimes we think if we drop hints the other person will get the message but this would most likely lead to uncertainty and expectations not being met. By communicating exactly what we want/need we leave no room for guessing games and this gives the other person a chance to respond suitably. For example, your friend wants you to pick up a book from the library on your way back from work because it is close to your place of work but you have a prior engagement you need to attend to and you know getting the book will delay your meeting. Instead of saying “Ok I will try to get the book” simply say something like “I would have loved to help but unfortunately that will mean I might run late for my meeting. Please could you make alternative arrangements to get the book”. That way your friend is not expecting you to get the book and depending on how urgent she needs it, will make other arrangements to get it. Remember you rejected the request and not the person.

Another example that comes to mind is when people get invited to an outing; they say they will try to make the outing knowing they have no plans to attend. People say that is being diplomatic but that is simply just a lie. I believe it is better to politely decline with your reasons so that way you are setting the person’s expectation at that point.

Don’t keep quiet when you have strong feelings about an issue: There are some issues not worth arguing over and sometimes the more mature thing to do is keeping quiet. Silence they say is golden. However when it comes to your health, your safety, your core values, or you know the price of keeping silence will result into anger or resentment it is better to speak up than suffer in silence. For example, your partner typical stays out late and this is a behaviour you cannot stand. This is not the time to keep quiet and hope he/she gets the message someday. This is the time to speak up, communicate how you feel about his/her staying out late and probably both of you can come to an understanding.

Take time out if you need to contain your anger: Have you noticed sometimes you find yourself getting angry during a conversation? At this point it is better to take a break from the discussion than continue. We can hardly communicate effectively when our judgement is clouded with emotions. When we feel much better we can come back and present our position more effectively. This is different from cutting off another person emotionally, which is a destructive tactic that some of us tend to do.

Think through your arguments before presenting them: Because we sometime think our opinion makes more sense than the other person we might tend to get lost in the trivial details that we forget the main points of our arguments. If we want to effectively get our point across we should think through the issues and get down to the core points. The other person might be much more willing to listen if your ideas are presented in an organised and consistent way.



So that's it for tips. I hope they made sense. Please feel free to share other assertiveness tips. Meanwhile I might be going on an assertiveness course at work, if it gets approved. Will let you know what I learn on the course. :)

Ten things Tuesday (03)

Hi. I am back with another ten things tuesday. Here's a link to my last list.

Remember in all things give thanks!!!

1. For wisdom and discernment this past week
2. For safety & protection
3. For all my friends who gave birth this past week- men loads of people are having babies.
4. The UK visa embargo has been lifted in Nigeria! And my friend has now applied for her visa
5. Was believing God for something last week but it didn’t go as I expected yet I still give thanks because I know it is for a reason
6. I have launched my business!!! Going slowly but surely. Will update y’all with more details soonest besides I am looking for customers :D
7. For summer...its so warm right now..I am loving it!
8. For my wonderful loving husband
9. My granduncle passed away at over 80! He lived a well fulfilled life.
10. For all my blog friends. You are all just too much!!!!

What are you thankful for this week?

N.B- Just to let you know I have not forgotten about the assertiveness tips! Am just getting my materials & act together. Will post it soonest. Muah!

God of Wonders- Cliff Young (Tagged...NOT!)

I waited and waited to see if anyone will tag me..but alas no one so i decided to tagged myself! lol..Actually I wasn't hoping to get tagged, as I don't really like to do meme, till I read Oluwadee's gospel like meme and i was inspired to do mine. That was when I started waiting to be tagged o. Don't worry I forgive you all. LOL.

Anyway decided to do the song meme..or whatever you people call it. Am not going to state any rules jo..I'll just do it.

So here goes:

*IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
King of Kings (He’s a wonder)- Cece Winans
He is a wonder in my life so it is ok!

*WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Once in a blue moon- Lighthouse Family
Shu lol…I don’t get this one

*WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
One Desire- Hillsong
Yes o having similar desires in life is something I like in a guy

*HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Speechless- Steven Curtis Chapman
This annoying rain that has been pouring non stop is making me speechless

*WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Let’s just praise the Lord- Don Marsh
Hmm… My life’s purpose is to give all the praise, thanks and glory to God. You deserves it all.

*WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
This Kingdom- Hillsong
It’s all about God’s kingdom. Seek first HIS kingdom and all other things shall be added unto you.

*WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
If anything ever happened to you- Bebe & Cece Winans…
Abi? how could my friends go on if anything ever happened to me?? I believe they pray that nothing bad happens to me! Aww

*WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Written in the Stars- West life
LOL..ok I dunno how to analyse this one…hmm ok the chorus of the song helps. Looking at my life and how the pieces fall into place it won’t have turned out right without them in it.

*WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Sweet Surrender- Jaci Velasquez
AH! I do think a lot about the benefit yet the struggle of always surrendering to God

*WHAT IS 2+2?
All I have to give- Backstreet boys.
LOL…2+ 2 is all I have to give to you!

*WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
I can’t complain- Dewayne Woods….
Yes o I can’t complain about any best friend i have had at any point in my life. I appreciate them all

*WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Faith Enough- Carman
I have faith that God will see Husby and I through the journey

*WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Running with the Night- Lionel Richie
Nawa o…a beg i’ll rather sleep at night than run

*WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Jesus is the answer- Simply Worship 1
Yes ke, I want to be more like Jesus each and everyday

*WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Shelter in the Rain- 4Him
Hubsy with God’s help is my shelter!!

*WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
My God- Point of Grace
“My God what a lovely daughter”…I wish! But I presume that is what they think of me now. Not when I was younger sha cuz I was very troublesome

*WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
That somebody was you- Kenny G
This thing dey correct o. Yes baby, it was you all along!

*WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Fill My Cup- Cece Winans
Ah! Shu. Abeg o, Which cup?

*WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Larger than Life- Backstreet boys
LOL..this wan pass me o…is sleeping larger than life??

*WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
The Prayer Anthem- Carman
This thing don catch me. Hmm my secret is that I have not been praying as much as I ought to. Forgive me lord

*WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Spiritual Love Trin-i-tee 5:7
I have agape love for all my friends :)

Finally
*WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
God of Wonders- Cliff Young

Nice one!

That was refreshing..hehehe

Ten things Tuesday (02)

Here's my second list of ten things to be thankful for this past week. You can find a link to my first list here

1. Hubby and I celebrated our six months wedding anniversary on Saturday. It's been a wonderful ride so far!
   
2. For protection against all evil
   
3. Met up with a blogger friend, tolatino this last week. T'was really nice catching up and we talked some bit on what we have in common, wearing braces! I stopped wearing braces about 2 years ago, she wears them now.
   
4. I am getting more confident and comfortable with my driving.
5. My brother in law and his wife had a bouncing baby boy! I am so elated for them
6. My new business idea is forming shape- will fill you in when it becomes a reality. Quite excited
   
7. A good friend of mine got his American student visa
8. For the British high commission in Nigeria going on strike or whatever. Was really upset about this cuz a friend was just about to drop her application for her British visa but couldn't cuz of this strike issue but I still thank God because am sure he knows why this is happening now. I pray they call off this thing soonest!!!!
9. Healing over rashes on my neck and arm. I thought it came as a result of the hay fever drug the doctor prescribed but apparently he says it's another allergy. Whatever! The rashes are clearing up and I am so happy about that!
10. For the joys of womanhood. Don't think I want to elaborate further but I am thankful that I am a woman.

So what are you thankful for?

You don’t have to catch the ball

There’s a new principle I have learnt lately that I will like to share with you. “When someone throws the ball at you, you don’t have to catch it”. Everyday, people (spouses, colleagues, friends, family etc) throw all kinds of balls at us and most of us think it is our duty to catch them. We see ourselves as heroes and pride in the ability to rescue our family and friends when they are in trouble. However when we do this often we sometimes begin to feel resentful, blaming others for taking advantage of us or for not giving us the respect we think we deserve. It is like a vicious cycle- you want to please everyone yet you are not happy because you feel manipulated.

Why do we find ourselves in situations like this? Maybe because we don’t want to look bad or we want people to like us or we simply have a rescuer mentality. It sometimes boils down to the ability to saying no. Before I continue please note that I am not saying we should never be there for our families and friends, what I am saying is that we choose when to be there. That way, we don’t blame others for taking up all our time since we made that choice to be available in the first place. The funny thing is when we choose not to catch the ball, the person will bounce their ball to someone else who eventually will catch it (shows you are not the only one in the world that can help).

Saying no does not mean you reject the person it simply means you reject the task or whatever it is they want you to get involved in. This is where assertiveness comes in. I read somewhere that assertiveness is “your ability to know who you are and what you stand for - and then to express these qualities effectively in everyday interactions with other people”. Assertiveness is a skill we all have to learn as it does not come to us naturally. People generally lean towards passiveness (trying to keep peace at all times) or aggression (resorting to violence when saying no). Assertion increases constructive communication and relationship between people.

The consequence of being assertive is that people respect your feelings and your boundaries. You know you have a right to express your opinions or beliefs even when it contradicts what others are saying or what they want you to do.

One area where most of us see ourselves catching the ball is picking up our mobile/phone when it rings. It's a strange one but it is true. Mobile phones can be a BIG time stealer. We pick up the phone and sometimes get involved in idle chats and later on realise that we haven't achieved much either at work or with the house chores. Sometimes when I am doing my house chores and my phone rings I let it ring out. My hubby gets upset with me when I do this but I tell him it is my mobile phone and I can choose to answer it or not. Besides I can always call this person back. More often than not if the call is really important the caller either leaves a message on my voicemail or sends me an sms. This is not to say I don't appreciate my friends or I don't want people calling me but I have learnt that I am in control of my time and can't catch the ball at that time. Speaking of which, I need to return some calls I missed this weekend!

Anyway, I hope you get the point I am trying to make. It might not apply to everyone but am sure someone out there needs to read this. Next time I will be talking about some assertiveness tips for everyday life. Meanwhile enjoy your week and remember when someone throws the ball at you, you don't have to catch it.

Ten things Tuesday (01)

Hi peeps, remember I told you about something I wanted to get involved in. Ok, I came across a blog which has this brilliant idea of “Ten things Tuesday”. You can read more about the idea here. I thought to myself, oh wow what a spectacular initiative and decided to be part of it. I know most of you have done the thankful me me but this takes it to the next level. Ok quick disclaimer- I do not promise to have a post up every Tuesday but I promise to have a more thankful attitude in my life. The bible says “In all things give thanks”. Though this can prove to be hard sometimes, God expects us by his grace to be thankful.

Hmm ok now this got me thinking o..kai ten things huh?! lol..here goes

1. Summer is here! however I sometimes get the hay fever!


2. For healing over hay fever


3. I have a good job even though sometimes I get bored with it


4. For the new friend Fumosh i made on facebook. Later I find out she is a fellow blogger :)
   


5. For protection against all kind of evil (with all these knife killing stories u hear in the UK, na God o)


6. My mobile phone fell in water, didn't realise till like 5 mins later but it's still working!


7. The offer we placed on a house was accepted, so we are moving in a few weeks


8. OK the mobile phone in 6 has packed up! Can't access anything in the phone anymore but I have a spare mobile phone I am using now


9. My very good friend from Ghana is visiting!!!


10. Started (re)learning how to drive and I am getting better and better. Hubsy is helping to boost my confidence as well.

What are you thankful for??

It's Father's day!!!

Hello my people, long time no see, no hear, no blog! Am sorry I have been away from blogville. I was dealing with all kinds, perceiving them has life's crisis and suddenly realised that Life is not one BIG emergency and I cannot save the day! Moral of the story- Aloted, have time for your blog and blogger friends! Missed u all and I will be doing my blog rounds ASAP.

Today is fathers day, therefore I want to dedicate my post to the father figures in my life.

Firstly I am grateful to the First father in my life- my heavenly father. I know sometimes I can be a very naughty daughter but your mercy has kept me even then. You have protected me from all sorts of evil, you have ordered my steps, you have provided for my needs and you have seen me through trials and temptations. You have been a faithful God. For this I am thankful. Even when things happen that I don’t understand you are still my father. Words cannot begin to say how much I am grateful for your love and your loving kindness.

Secondly, I want to appreciate the man God chose to father me on this earth. Daddy, you are indeed the best. I couldn’t have asked for a better father on earth (if I had to). You have been a loving husband to momsie. Never once have I seen you disrespect mum or have an major argument with her in front of us the kids. Even now your love for each other grows everyday, I pray for such love between Husby and I. Even though for some years you had to work outside the country, your presence was still very much felt back home. I am thankful for the sacrifice you had to make because I know you did it for us. I know you are not perfect but you are still the best to me. You brought us up in the way of the Lord and I am sure you are glad we didn’t disappoint!

Thirdly a shout out to all my uncles on both my father and mother’s side. Gosh we had loads of uncles live with us when we were growing up and I am particularly thankful for my uncle Gboye (my mum’s youngest brother) who impacted my life in ways he might not know. He taught me about boys and their tricks when I was a teenager. He taught me about knowing how to choose the right man when I became older. He taught me a lot! Uncle Gboye, you are just too much!!!

Lastly, saving the best for last, this one is for my husby! Yes o he is a father figure in my life. I remember during our traditional wedding, I was told to describe my hubsy and I kept saying he is my friend, my lover, etc and the alagaduro (how do you say this in English???) said to me, "he is your father". In my head I was like father ke? LOL but indeed he is o. He is my head, the one I am now accountable too. I am thankful for your love, your strength and your kindness. You are the sweetest man I know and I know that when our children come they will have the best daddy ever. Love you loads!

This father's day I implore y'all to find time to appreciate the father figures in your life. I hope you will.

By the way, I should be back this week, by God's grace, with a blogger's initiative I have decided to get involved with. ;)

N.B: Picture was copied from www.donnabellas.com

Tagged..again

Ok so Rinsola tagged me
The rules are:
1. Link the person who tagged you to this post
2. Mention the rules in your blog
3. Tell 6 unspectacular quirks of yours
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged
This meme is about any particular mannerism you have, ok?

I have done something similar before, so i'll try not to repeat myself. How quirky can one get?? Anyway here goes:

1. As a kid, i had imaginary friends that i used to play and talk to. It was like i was in a different world. Apart from that I used to act out different parts e.g a teacher. I thot the imaginary world was the coolest thing till i got caught one day by my siblings. I was so embarrassed. Anyway I moved to day dreaming, at least that way no one would know! I cant believe I got over day dreaming cuz it was like a mega addiction till like my SS1 or so. In that world, i had a husband, a son and twin girls and we all lived happily ever after. I think i should stop here before i get labelled "crazy".
2. I used to be a VERY mushy person till hmm I dunno life happened to me. I used to write letters on flowery paper to my friends, you know like all those thank u for being my friend notes. I used to write out quotes and sayings that inspired me in a little cute book (i wonder where that book is now). Now the weird thing is i don't do stuff like that enuff more! Find it gooey. I actually think I was a lot nicer in those days. Now I am more of a realist. When I see mushy stuff happening around me am like yuck what da?? Fortunately or not, husby is on the mushy side so am adjusting to that again. Now what i find more weird is I am very emotional but can't really stand mushiness. Maybe i just like playing hardball...who knows
3. I can't stand strictly romantic books like Mills and Boons, i find them boring and predictable. I'll rather stick to a James Hardly Chase (actually i don't read them anymore) or something more on the suspense side...Hmm i think i have a dark side!
4. My best hobby is sleeping. I can sleep anywhere anytime anyplace as long as my head finds a comfortable position
5. Cold is the default temperature I feel even when it is hot. I always have a scarf or a sweater or something extra with me because I am definitely going to feel cold
6. *Edited*- I look waaaaaaay younger than my age, people see me and think am 19/20. Na yam?? LOL. Well I take it as a compliment as long as they don't feel I act 19/20.

Ok that's it for now. I tag writefreak, inmyheadandaroundme, ajike (you have now been officially untagged:P lol), aijay, lady a, proud naija wife, Tyger. Looks like almost everyone has done this meme, so was kinda hard finding someone to tag.

Old age or what??

Over the last couple of weeks I have had 3 bizarre cases of absentmindedness …not sure if its old age or carelessness or restlessness or what, maybe you guys can help figure it out.

Incident 1- I went to the shops to get something I needed to send off through my aunt to Naija. I was running late to catch the train so that day me sef I know I was really scattered. Anyway I got the stuff found my way to the station and stood on the queue to get a ticket and at the same time watching the time as the train was fast approaching. When the queue got to the person before my turn I decided to bring out my debit card so I could pay the guy fast and jump on the train, lo and behold my card was nowhere in sight. At this point I was not impressed at all with myself or my card! Where on earth did I throw this card?!!! Luckily I had some cash on me so I got my ticket and decided to go look for my card. I was already fuming because at this point I obviousily couldn’t catch the train. Anyway I went back to all the shops I went to and fortunately the first shop I went too had found my card! Oya give me my card they said they needed to see evidence that I was the owner. Fair enough I thought, only to check my wallet to find out that ALL the cards I had on me were in my maiden name! Grrrhhh Abi which kain rubbish be this. I bring everything out and try to explain to the lady that I recently got married and so changed my name and didn’t have any other id in my new name. The woman no gree o. She said she needed to see anything in my new name. I tried again and said “look my initials are the same, I am the same person, see, this is my old debit card, blah blah”. Rara o..the woman no look my side. At this point I was UPSET. I angrily left and went all the way home. I tried to calm myself down by saying the woman was only doing her job but I was still upset jo. Anyway to cut the long story short I took my office id card, my cheque book and my bills (yes o, se u want to know if its me or not, I will show you). I even wanted to take my marriage ceritifiate but I was like this babe take it easy..lol. Anyway I showed them that I was me (lol) and they gave me back my card. Thank God for that!

Incident 2- a week later or so I go to the same shop, bought some groceries and thought to use the self service section so I wouldn’t stay on the queue. I decided I needed some cash so after paying I asked for £10 cash back. Conscious of not wanting to lose my card again, I made sure I put the card in my purse, took my receipt and left. Half way home, I realised I didn’t take the £10 from the machine! Omo men I was like, you this girl what is your problem. I run back to the shop and prayed quietly that I won’t have any issues. I spoke to one of the shop attendants and explained to him I forgot to take my £10 and showed him my receipt to show that I indeed asked for cash back. I actually felt stupid at that point. I thought the guy was going to stress me and start ask me silly questions to proof that I didn’t have the £10 but thankfully he opened the till beside the machine and gave me £10. I hurriedly said thank you and scrammed before he changed his mind!

Incident 3- This time, it happened at work. I went to the canteen to get some lunch and decided to bring it back to my desk. I bought lunch, went back to the office and ate my lunch. After eating I needed to make a call then I realised my phone was missing! Ah! Ki lo fe fa gbogbo nonsense yi. God please I hope am not running mad. I started looking round my desk, called the phone with my desk phone but it just rang out. Anyway I dashed back to the canteen and asked the lady that works there if any phone was reported missing, she replied no. I wasn’t sure what to do at this point but something, I guess the Holy Spirit told me to ask one of the lady at the check out point. There were two of them and I felt inclined to ask one of them in particular. Anyway I walk up to her and ask her if she found any phone. She looked at me oddly and said “is this your phone”, I was like “yes, thank you” and left. That what how I found my phone o.

Ok I am glad all three cases had happy endings albeit some stress was involved but I am still a bit worried that the incidences above happened in the space of 3 weeks. I won’t say I am a very vigilant person but I usually double check myself whenever I go out to make sure I don’t loose anything. Sincerely I don’t understand what the issue is…do u think it is a one off or a “three off “in my case. Do things like these happen to you (I know it happens to writefreak some times) but would you call my incidences carelessness or what??

Thoughts appreciated!

N.B- Pls ignore all errors, no time to read over and i want to post it NOW! hehe

Go Shortie....

Before the day (my day) runs out, I'll like to give all glory to God for making me a year older today. Without u Lord I am nothing. I give you all thanks.

Husby, today was just too fantastic...u made it sooooooooooo extraordinary for me. First birthday as the Mrs...well not bad, not bad at all ;)

I also appreciate my family and friends for making today special for me. I am more than overwhelmed. I got calls/smses/facebook messages from all over the world...Y'all are just too much!

Shout out to all my birthday mates..u know yourselves...I hope you had a blast just like I did!

Go, go, go, go. Go shortie it's your birthday....

It is Well- Part 2

Hello People,

Hope you all had a great weekend? On my last blog entry I felt compelled to write about this three words- "it is well" and I said I would conclude on my next entry. Well here goes. Sorry this is coming a bit late. Part 1 can be found here.

I am not sure how many of you have heard/sang this great hymn “It is Well with my Soul”. I love the song so much because the words are so profound and deep. I decided to do some research on the song and the person who was inspired to write it and this was what I found.

This hymn was written by Horatio Gates Spafford a famous Chicago lawyer. Looking at the title of the song you would probably think this man had it all together- family, money, wealth and all the good things in life. Well initially he did till he suffered unthinkable personal catastrophe.

First of all, his only son was killed by scarlet fever at the age of four. A year later, there was a great fire that destroyed a large estate he had heavily invested in. As a result of this he lost so much money. Am guessing by now some of us would think there is definitely someone after this man (maybe some old woman in the village). Anyway to get away from all the calamity around him, he decided to take his family on holiday to England. As they were getting ready to depart, some last minute business came up which kept Spafford behind. He decided to send his family ahead of him. Nine days later, Spafford received a telegram from his wife in Wales saying "Saved alone." Apparently the ship they were on collided with another ship and sank! Only his wife survived, while their four daughters died.

When he heard the terrible news, Spafford boarded the next ship out of New York to join his bereaved wife. On his way, the captain of the ship he was on, called him and showed him the spot where the ship sank. He then returned to his cabin and penned the lyrics of his great hymn- It is Well with My Soul.

Sad as it is, this song reveals a man whose trust was in the Lord because how else can you write a song saying it is well with your soul with so many catastrophe in your life none stop! I am not sure how many of us have experienced half as much sorrow and it would be difficult to predict what we would do under similar circumstances. However, the fact still remains that even though bad things happen in life, God is still a good God and we should put our trust in him. Who else could we even depend on except the Omnipresence and Omniscience (is everywhere and knows all) Hmm...I think I should stop here before i start a whole new topic!

Below are the lyrics of this great song

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot,
Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Chorus-
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

I hope this song makes some sense to you like it made sense to me.

My prayer is that as we move into the next quarter of this year 2008, it is well with us no matter the circumstances that come our way. If God is on our side, no one, nothing can be against us.

God bless!

Back in the days!!!!!!

Hello people, sorry I have not updated in like forever. You know naa, I still dey honeymoon..lol. Anyway a friend sent me the piece below and I just had to share with y'all. Coincidentally just yesterday, Rinsola and I were reminiscing about TV programmes we used to watch as kids. I remember most of the TV programmes below- Sesame street, SuperTed and DangerMouse were my favorite to watch. I guess the ones I don't know were the ones that aired when I was having my siesta lol. Gosh it was so much fun being a child- no worries, no responsibilities, just play and more play, mummy and daddy worried about clothes, books, food etc. Sometimes I wish I could be go back to being a child. Anyway enjoy the following piece. Oh by the way, only Nigerians born before 1984, lived in Nigeria and watched NTA will be able to relate with this piece.
ENJOY!!!
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Don't know how many of you lived in my time but you belong to my day if:

You had to wait till 4 o'clock to get any meaningful thing on NTA
You would eagerly sit in front of the T.V at 3:30pm watching all the multicolored lines while you waited for NTA come up.

The National Anthem was the first thing on TV

You watch Thunder sub and Terrahawks on Mondays. Pigeon Street and Bertha came after. Samanja was for 7:30 and you hated Newsweek on Monday nights

You watch Fragle rock , Sesame Street and animal games on Tuesdays. Reach out was at 5:30. Your elder ones disturbed your flow at 6:30pm on Tuesdays to watch koko close (Oluwalambe lord, Kasali open the gate), then you all watched new masquerade at 8:30pm.

You enjoyed Voltron and hated commander mark on Wednesdays. Renta-ghost came up at 6pm then Kidi vision 101 at 6:30. Cock crow at dawn was up at 7:30 then Bassey and company (Mr. B is a millionaire) at 8:30.

G-force , Scooby doo and Super-Ted were the deal on Thursdays; Wazombia didn't make sense then Village head master at 8:30pm.

Friday had the variety of Birdman , Galaxy trio , Ovid video , inspector gadget , danger mouse e.t.c.
Friday nights……….. can't figure it anymore (some one else can fill in the gap)

Saturday mornings were boring after 10am. 7-10am had WWF then morning ride came up for 10am (very boring). The rest of the day had several annoying sport programs; but Things fall apart came up at 8pm.

Network news was very boring.

The only good thing on Sundays was behind the clouds.


Hoped u enjoyed d reminiscing...and for the veterans amongst us, kindly fill in the missing programs.


NB: If you were born later than 1984, you might not be able to recall any of these graceful memories.

Another milestone- Major this time!

Hi peeps, sorry I haven't updated in a while. Thanks Rinsola for checking up on me.



I have some very great news for y'all. I have crossed yet another milestone. Hehe You can check here for a previous milestone of mine.

On the 12th of January '08, I got married to my best friend. :) It was a glorious day and I enjoyed every minute of it. I was just a tiny weeny bit cranky (which is expected from all brides, I think) but thanks to my chief brides maid for calming me down always. More kudos to writefreak cuz without her I am not sure our friends wouldn't have had anything to eat at the reception. Another story for another day.



Anyway like I was saying, our day was great and most of my wishes came through-

• Our bridal march song was "When God gave me you" by Jesse Campbell; T.D Jakes. T'was really lovely with all the long list of people walking down the aisle which included my only surviving grandparent (Mama). Can't wait to see the video :)


• Still on the bridal march, I had my flower girls throw petals on the floor..even the pastor was taken by that...lol


• Our First dance- we danced to "I was made to love you" by Gerald Levert... that turned out better than I expected, except for the few times my hubby was stepping on my dress..lol

The wishes that didn't come through-

• I wanted a canopy for our friends to sit in, with favours I had ready on their tables- lai lai...people no gree...ok the canopy existed quite alright but you know Naija weddings now, they never respect the sign "Reserved". Grhhh


• Spraying of money- lol...with all the adverts on Naija telly on arresting people that spray money at weddings and the fact that our chairman's wife (who was present) is a Director General of CBN, this wish was no where near reality. We got people to drop money in trays though- BORING!

Anyhu, above all I want to thank God all mighty for making Jan 12 a reality for my hubby, myself and our families. It was a beautiful day I must say.

Hubby and I are looking forward to a bright future together. :)

"I am the New Year"

Happy New Year everyone!!!! 2008 is your year of new birth. The Lord says "Forget the things of the past, I want to do a new thing in your life." (Isaiah 43-18-19). Let go and Let God!!!

By the way, a friend sent me this new year poem that I will like to share with you. I hope it blesses you as it did me.

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I Am The New Year
Author Unknown Life

I am the New Year.
I am an unspoiled page in your book of time.
I am your next chance at the art of living.
I am your opportunity to practice what you
have learned about life during the last twelve months.
All that you sought and didn't find is hidden in me,
waiting for you to search it out with more determination.
All the good that you tried for and didn't achieve
is mine to grant when you have fewer conflicting desires.
All that you dreamed but didn't dare to do,
all that you hoped but did not will,
all the faith that you claimed but did not have -
these slumber lightly,waiting to be awakened
by the touch of a strong purpose.
I am your opportunity to renew your allegiance to Him
who said, 'behold, I make all things new.'

I am the New Year.

Feliz Navidad/Merry Christmas!!!

Hi peeps!

This is to wish you a Merry Christmas. As we party and share gifts let us remember to be thankfully to God for sending his Son Jesus to save mankind. Christ indeed is the reason for the season. Not sure when next I'll be blogging but till then enjoy your Christmas and Happy New year in advance.

I leave you with this Christmas poem by Nicholas Gordon

May you find this Christmas inner peace
Equal to the patient love you give,
Releasing all the pain you can release,
Renewing all the grace with which you live.
Yearnings may you turn to rhapsodies,
Choosing to find happiness in beauty,
Holding in their haunting melodies
Riches that sustain your sense of duty.
In anger may you find an evening star
Showing you the way to Bethlehem.
The angels that watch naked from afar
May you hear songs of who would none condemn.
As all you love are blessed in having you
So may you feel the joy in all you do.

Copyright by Nicholas Gordon

7 random/weird things- Tagged by Tayo

Ok I never thought I would get tagged on this particular topic but thanks to Tayo who is trying to gain revenge bcuz I tagged him on something quite relevant . Now I have to think deep about random "stuffs" about me.

Before i start here are the rules

1) Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog
2) Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself
3) Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs
4) Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog

Those that have been tagged will know at the end, so keep reading :)

1) I can be such a cry baby. I actually think my tear glands are right on my eye lids. If I watch a sad movie, I cry, if someone tells me a sad story I cry, if I get really upset over something I cry. Kai I remember once I went to watch a movie in the cinema, cant even remember the title of the movie now but it was the movie where Denzel Washington was a boxer and he was put in prison cuz he was black and they said he killed someone- remember that movie, yes o I cried from the beginning to the end. Since then I promised myself I’ll only go watch action movies and no true life dramas in the cinema. Then I again, I cried when I watched Blood Diamond considering its actioned packed..Omo men I don cry for this life o

2) I can sleep for Nigeria, infact for Africa. If you ask me what my hobby is I’ll most likely reply “sleeping”, of cuz I won’t say that in an interview session! Lol. Me and sleep are like best friends…actually I think I have improved on this sleeping business. When I was younger, I think it was when I was waiting to enter Uni I used to sleep from 12 midnight to 12 noon (half a day, can you imagine). I don’t like anything or anyone disturbing my sleep time. If I have ever sounded grouchy on the phone to you, please no vex, you prolly woke me up from my beauty sleep! When I feel forlorn or when I feel life's trouble is towing down on me- sleep is the remedy. When people say they have insomia I used to wonder what they meant till it happened to me two nights consecutively! Omo men I fear o… Actually it was one flu drug I took that I was reacting to. Never again, how can sleep elude me?! My friends have warned me to better get over this sleeping mania cuz when I get married Mr. husband will not find it funny. Hehehe…I shall cross that bridge when I get there…hopefully!

3) Now I find this really really weird but it happens. When I attend a wedding, party, function, the table I sit at is the last table that gets served. That's if we are lucky o. For some reason I am still trying to fathom, they always miss the table I sit at…even if it’s the most obvious table. Not only food o..when they distribute gifts they must miss my table ni sha! I don’t understand o…I guess till I do maybe I should stop attending events or better still eat enough before attending so that it wont pain me when food passes over my table.

4) I am claustrophobic. I get very uncomfortable when I am in a crowd. That’s why I dislike going to the market or events done at the stadium or at the redeemed camp. I’ll rather go to a supermarket or watch the event on TV respectively. I also don’t like it when people’s bodies touch mine- e.g. when dancing in church and the whole place is crowded and people are dancing into each other- I’ll rather sit at the end of a row, that way, limited contact. Or in a car I hate body contact. I believe people should stay in their personal space and not encroach into mine… I find it annoying when people I am walking with don’t walk in their “lane” and cross into mine, or on the train/tube, you go sit beside someone because there is no other place to sit and they can’t just stay in their space and their leg, arm, bum, body is crossing into your space…grhhhhhh. I find it very very annoying…lol..i know it sounds really weird. Of cuz this does not apply to family or very close friends. Lol…am not that bad o.

5) I hate to admit this but I can’t drive! Actually its more of I don’t drive cuz I can drive in my head but not in real life lol. I have gone to driving school twice and both my driving instructions said I was a good student but omo forget o. I blame my Popc jo. He didn’t/doesn't trust my driving abilities so he refused to release any of his cars for me to practice with. Anyway I hate it that I don’t drive…I really do so I am going to do something about it. This time next year I will tell you a different story. ;)


6) In the last 5 years I have gained maybe just 5 kilograms. Actually I can still fit into the clothes I used to wear 7 years…lol..my dad complains am too skinny but I don’t think so, H2B doesn’t think so, so that’s good enough for me. And its not like I don't eat o. Well i eat small portions at short intervals. To worsen matters, I look younger than my age. I have even had secondary school boys step up to me…if only they knew I was old enuff to be their aunty (ok was going to say mother).

7) I have more guy friends than girl friends… It became very obvious when more guys responded to my wedding “asoebi” mail than girls. See me see wahala o. Anyway I guess all that is going to change once I tie the knot. To be honest I find it easier to relate to guys than girls…less drama…considering I can be such a drama queen myself.

8) Oh they said 7, i was about to go and and on...all of a sudden am remembering all these weird stuffs about me...hehehehe...how weird/random am i??

I hereby tag writefreak, rinsola, cherub, inmyheadandaroundme, ifeolu, copido and daddysgirl. That’s if you haven’t already done this. And if you've been tagged by someone else that means you really need to do this :)

Dekunle Fuji- "Mo like Jesu gan" + 30 Days of Thankfulness

Mennnnnnnnn this is the latest song am feeling o. I am not a fuji person but omo this track is da bomb. Makes fuji sound like the best- correct yahoozee fuji song.

I have been playing it all week...and trust youtube to have the video. Let me know your thoughts...

"le le le, le le le" ;) hehehehe





Ok I was tagged by writefreak on 30 days of thanksfulness. Am not sure what day of thankfulness this is but am going to go ahead and be thankfully!

I am thankful for the following reasons:

1. The gift of life- I am so glad I am one of the living. Only the living can praise the Lord
2. The gift of salvation- thank you Jesus for redeeming me from the power of darkness into your marvellous light
3. For my parents, for bringing me up in the way of the Lord. I wonder what my life would have been like otherwise!
4. For my siblings- they are simply the best
5. For my husband to be- you have taught me what love is. Thanks babes!
6. For my past, my mistakes- they have molded me to be who I am today and I can confidently say I have learnt from them and can help others in the future
7. For my present- nothing like being in the present
8. For my future- it is sooooooooo bright!!!
9. For my friends- you guys have blessed me in one way or the other.
10. For being me and not anybody else cuz there is just no one else like me. I am an original!!!

Ok I tag omodudu and tayoodukoya. I know you guys talk on politics and stuff but pls do this for me and for yourselves. Muahhhh